Military Gray - When it comes to developing and conducting special operations assessment and selection courses that the Army should offer, there are many opinions, and I feel there are many misconceptions. This is especially true when it comes to being a "grey person", a common term people use to describe an operator who can blend seamlessly into their surroundings.

I have been asked about this countless times in emails. One of the most common questions I always get from selection candidates is trying to combine the evaluation and selection - to be

Military Gray

Military Gray

There is no shortage of people who will tell you that it is important to be a gray man, some of them will be members of the special operations select cadre. So, in order, I disagree. In general, unless you are a trained spy in stealth and invisibility, I would stick to my original advice and in most cases it is not a smart thing to do. I'll explain why below, but first, my caveat:

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Yes, there are times when you want to be the guy who actually sees people standing in front of you giving the "spot" to someone else.

The first is if you are in the SERE (Survival, Evasion, Resistance and Escape) school. The last thing you want at SERE is to stand out in any way. Standing with the guard force in a POW camp often meant that they would suffer some "corrective measures".

Being the oldest member of the inmates or the oldest person in the SERE class is not a good way to become a gray man. The SRO (Senior Site Officer) is always assigned to actual or apparent violations of the rules…. You get the idea. After going through the selection process and the training tube, you will get an up close and personal experience of SERE and all your questions will be answered.

A second example of when it's a good time to be a "grey person" is when you're doing some kind of secret thinking. Then you want to join your environment. If you see someone walking down a busy street in an urban area, you don't want to raise an alarm among surveillance operators looking for that kind of behavior.

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This has a lot to do with manners, dress, manners and movement. Special Forces have a training program that teaches all this and more. But once the course and its accompanying acronym training is complete, head to the operating rooms and get some experience under your belt.

So, we're back to the 800-lb gorilla in the room, and the question is, "Why not the gray man during the election?" From people's blog posts, message boards, and social media posts, you'll see all the candidates "be it the gray man" or something remotely similar. I see it all the time. So why is it really a bad idea?

As I mentioned above, most people are not properly trained to be gray. And if it seems to the recruiter that you're trying to blend in with the background, that's not a good thing. For the cadre members, it seems they are trying to "die" with actions (as we called it when I was there). And if a man is ghosted during the election, he will definitely be in a group.

Military Gray

Back in the day, when I was on night duty on the course, one of the "grey men" of the cadre and I would wander around the competitors' quarters at night. We want to hear the class chat and see how good or not good they are.

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These conversations are sometimes very interesting, especially during group week. More than once, we have heard candidates who have passed their patrol (the criteria have changed, thanks to LTC Brian Decker) talk about going through the last few events to get through the long-range move. Bad idea.

Then there were other people, they passed their defense and the next day people were in the barrel and under the microscope to help those who were willing to help. We have heard the same words more than once:

"Hey bud, whatever, put me on the lashes tomorrow, I'm great, and that's one thing you don't have to worry about."

He is the person I want in my team. He's not done yet, he's looking for his teammates. He gets high marks in his peer reports.

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Special jobs aren't looking for cookie-cutter robots. We understand that everyone is different and there are definitely guys with characters. No doubt you have some in your room.

That's why my advice is always "be yourself". When I was there, our cadre was the largest I have ever worked with. There was never a dull moment and every NCO, although very different, respected each of us for who we were. And we got along because we had the humility to understand that everyone brings something unique to the table.

If you're a rah-rah kind of guy, be that guy. If you're a quiet, lead by example kind of guy, that's fine...be him. Don't try to be something you're not. Sometimes the characters in the room lift everyone around. All members of the cadre have had such men in their own units, and they know how valuable they are to maintaining the spirit of the unit and building a team.

Military Gray

My unit at SFQC (Special Forces Qualification Course) had an excellent NCO who we called "Camouflage CPT" during Land Nav. He wore some unusual get-up; Pitty shorts went the extra mile, bush boots, with a poncho pulled over the top like a cape and eye holes cut out. He ran through the tree line giving the most insane encouragement to the "Lost Nev students everywhere." As silly as it sounds, our class loved it. And a day or so later, after the cadet has returned from a day or night of reconnaissance exercise, "Captain Camouflage" asks if he has any word about the unit.

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I recently recorded a podcast with Mike Sarrell, a Navy SEAL officer who wrote a book on special operations leadership and how civilian companies should incorporate selection and evaluation into their hiring process.

Before becoming an officer, Mike was a successful Marine NCO with Recon. While the BUDs were training to be SEALs, the other members of the unit approached Mike because of his experience, military worth, and character. Who is he? If he tried to blend into the background, the SEAL trainers would have seen him right and he would not have passed or approached the officer he belonged to.

Basic Underwater Demolition/SEAL (BUDS) candidates cover themselves in sand while floating aboard Naval Amphibious Base Coronado. (U.S. Navy photo by Mass Communication Specialist 1st Class Michael Russell/Released)

Of course, "be yourself" has to be a little annoying. Don't argue too much with the cadre... even if you know they might be right when you receive criticism. That will have the exact opposite effect to your intention. Don't be a "Spotlight Ranger" either - those types don't stick around until they get noticed (failed by peer reviews). And remember to share war stories about leading an attack with the 18th Mess Kit Maintenance Unit in Iraq or elsewhere. Nobody cares or cares about that.

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Remember that you are always being evaluated and evaluated. This is a time for the cadre to see if you have the core qualities that make them the best in the world. Selection is the time to start building a good following throughout your special operations career. And although it has grown, it is still a small community. Selection is the first step in the process of proving you belong to the regiment.

Trying to blend into the background is not the way to do it. Be yourself, try to excel in everything, and remember, some of your fellow candidates may be better than you at some things. That doesn't change once you get to the practical part.

Steve Balestrieri is a certified military analyst. He served as a US Army Special Forces NCO and Warrant Officer in the 7th Special Forces Group. In addition to writing for .com, he has written for 19fortyfive.com and SOFREP.com. He has covered the NFL for PatsFans.com for over 11 years. His work appeared regularly in the Millbury-Sutton Chronicle and Grafton News newspapers in Massachusetts.

Military Gray

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